How do I know which transition service(s) I need?
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Where is your journey currently taking you? Where does the terrain feel uncertain?
A few years ago, I finally got really honest with myself. I was perpetually frustrated with my work environment and irritable all the time. A wise colleague said he had seen it several times before, “If you’re not living out your leadership gifting you’re going to be perpetually discontent with the leaders around you.” This was my painful wake up call moment. I wasn’t living into my strengths and gifts, in particular my leadership gifts. I was critical and negative and felt STUCK without fully knowing it. I had small children at home and quite honestly I hated to admit my limitations. Excuses aside, I had to come clean that my criticism of others stemmed from my internal discontent. I would never thrive and be in a place of ultimate contribution until I was living into my calling. I was at a crossroads and had a decision to make. Was I going to keep complaining and be miserable to be around or was I willing to do something about it?
We all know someone like this. In fact if you’re honest, it may be you. We each reach a place of growth plateau in our development. Terry Walling, author of Stuck!: Navigating Life and Leadership Transitions, says there are 3 primary pivotal leadership transition points - late 20’s, mid 40’s and early 60’s.
Exactly true for me. Here I was at the turn of the decade in my 40’s. Where one has lived a little and determined what we can or can not put up with. We’ve seen good leaders and bad ones. We have stories to draw on and life experience to back up our decisions. We’ve experienced the working world for a number of years and start to see that our time is limited. It’s here people in their early 40’s experience a holy discontent and need objective outsiders and mentors who have gone before them to say truthful and sometimes hard things to challenge their developmental trajectory.
I thought I was on the right developmental track, but a few trusted mentors helped me realize that I needed to take time to be really honest about my situation and where my life was headed.
When people come to us as transition coaches, they are at a point of making a decision. A decision in leadership, or job change, role shift, or geographical move, to name a few. These are big decisions. And ones I don’t advise you go at alone. People come to us knowing they need something but don’t know where to start. We often hear, “What do I need? Where do I start?”
While there’s not a one-size fits all answer, this article explains The Way Between’s service offerings, including the questions you can ask yourself to coach yourself into a decision of which direction of care you need to focus on for your particular situation. You can see from our home page that The Way Between’s target audience is global workers in major life transition. However, the services are NOT limited to global workers only. You can also go to our services or event page to learn more about the many types of transition services we provide.
While knowing what is needed and where to start can sometimes be the hardest part on the journey. Here’s a short guide to lead you:
Start with, What statement(s) or complaints do I often hear myself saying: “I’m so tired. I hate this job. I’m overwhelmed with my workload. I need clarity. I wish I had more dreams.” These are your catalyst statements and indicators of where to start. These statements contain trigger words that I as a coach listen to, to determine what is most needed next.
Next ask yourself what question coincides with your catalyst statement? (There is a cheat sheet below for common statement/questions we hear). These are also indicators of what next steps to take. Example: “I am spread thin…Do I need to take some time off?” or, “I am in my 60’s and know my time on earth is limited…What is the best way to use my time and energy at this stage of life?”
Which one aspect of care do you need most? We work with people during vocational shifts, burnout, needing a sabbatical, leadership development or cross-cultural adjustment. Together we combine those statements, questions and our skills to determine fit. We have many tools and resources in our toolbelts to help with these questions. Below are a list of the top statements and questions we most often hear in this line of work. Listed alongside are a handful of the coinciding services that may assist you in creating a plan forward. Make note that individual coaching would provide you with a personalized approach and an understanding of other tools that may prove uniquely useful for your situation.
Paying attention to these statements as catalysts and questions as direction, can help you to begin to move ahead.
What statement(s) or complaints do I often hear myself saying most? These statements contain trigger words that I as a coach listen to, to determine what is most needed next.
Listed below is the Service Guide: Catalyst, Question and Service(s) Available Chart.
Listen to your internal nudge. What is one practical step you can take today to get you moving on the right path? Do any of these familiar to us statements + questions resonate with where you are at right now?
I am in my 60’s and know my time on earth is limited…What is the best way to use my time and energy at this stage of life?
Given my limitations of _____(time, money, resources, etc.), I’m finding it difficult to stay in my current role… What are my other options?
I am not experiencing fruit or enjoyment most of the time in my current role…should I stay in it?
I am spread thin…Do I need to take some time off?
I feel like I’m on the verge of burnout, there is just so much to do…How can I be intentional about how I use my time?
My kids are not thriving in school…Is that enough to uproot my family and repatriate?
I feel spiritually and emotionally dead…What can I do to regain momentum in this area?
I still feel angry at my past employer, spouse, or co-worker…Will I ever find peace?
Whether you have general or specific questions please don’t hesitate to ask. We, at The Way Between have a passion for serving people in major life transition, to live out their calling, make well-informed decisions, and reduce attrition through preventative measures. We offer competitively-priced and reduced-cost transition resources, personalized coaching and group workshops. We look forward to working with you.
For deeper reflection:
These statements are worth listening to. How often do you hear yourself saying them? Have others heard you say them? Ask! Where do you feel most stuck? What compels you to change? What inhibits you from doing anything about it?
